Congrats! You’ve made it past the pregnancy stage and have successfully created a new human. Now what? If the idea of raising a kid without some guidance seems daunting, these parenting books will get you through the finish line.
At Number 10, we have The Whole-Brain Child, by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. published in the year 2011. In this pioneering, practical book, Daniel J. Siegel, neuro-psychiatrist and author of the bestselling Mindsight, and parenting expert Tina Payne Bryson demystify the meltdowns and aggravation, explaining the new science of how a child’s brain is wired and how it matures. The “upstairs brain,” which makes decisions and balances emotions, is under construction until the mid-twenties. And especially in young children, the right brain and its emotions tend to rule over the logic of the left brain. No wonder kids can seem—and feel—so out of control. By applying these discoveries to everyday parenting, you can turn any outburst, argument, or fear into a chance to integrate your child’s brain and foster vital growth.
Number 9, is The science of Parenting, by Margot Sunderland which was published in the year 2006. Intriguing, thought-provoking, and controversial, this book offers practical parenting techniques, explains how a baby’s brain is hardwired, and gives strategies for parents at each age and stage of their baby’s development to ensure that their child is psychologically well adjusted, balanced, and emotionally healthy.
If you are going to get only one parenting book, this is the one I’d get. Understanding the science of children’s brain development and physiology is so important to understanding their behavior. This book dispels myths and conventional thinking with solid scientific facts. It doesn’t rely on “theories” based on any “expert’s” view.
On Number 8, we have No-Drama Discipline, by Dasniel J. Siegel, published in 2014. Highlighting the fascinating link between a child’s neurological development and the way a parent reacts to misbehavior, No-Drama Discipline provides an effective, compassionate road map for dealing with tantrums, tensions, and tears–without causing a scene. Defining the true meaning of the “d” word (to instruct, not to shout or reprimand), the authors explain how to reach your child, redirect emotions, and turn a meltdown into an opportunity for growth. By doing so, the cycle of negative behavior (and punishment) is essentially brought to a halt, as problem solving becomes a win/win situation.
At a fascinating Number 7, we have Between Parent and Child, by Haim G. Ginott, which was published in th eyear 2003. Over the past thirty-five years, Between Parent and Child has helped millions of parents around the world strengthen their relationships with their children. Written by renowned psychologist Dr. Haim Ginott, this revolutionary book offered a straightforward prescription for empathetic yet disciplined child rearing and introduced new communication techniques that would change the way parents spoke with, and listened to, their children. Dr. Ginott’s innovative approach to parenting has influenced an entire generation of experts in the field, and now his methods can work for you, too.
Number 6, is The Conscious Parent, written by Shefali Tsabary, published in 2010. It’s a tremendous privilege to raise children, though for a quite different reason than most of us who are parents imagine. While we think it’s our responsibility to mold and shape our children’s future, the essential premise of Dr. Shefali Tsabary’s A Call to Conscious Parenting is that our children are born to us to create deep internal transformation within us. Our children have the power to unleash our egoic behavior unlike anyone else, triggering all of our emotional reactivity. As, through our intimate relationship with them, we are exposed to our immaturity, they become our most accurate mirror of our own lack of emotional development. In other words, by inviting us to confront who we are in our relationship with them, our children raise us to be the parents they long for us to become.
At Number 5, we have Parenting From the Inside-Out, by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. published in 2004. How many parents have found themselves thinking: I can’t believe I just said to my child the very thing my parents used to say to me! Am I just destined to repeat the mistakes of my parents? In Parenting from the Inside Out, child psychiatrist Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., and early childhood expert Mary Hartzell, M.Ed., explore the extent to which our childhood experiences actually do shape the way we parent. Drawing upon stunning new findings in neurobiology and attachment research, they explain how interpersonal relationships directly impact the development of the brain, and offer parents a step-by-step approach to forming a deeper understanding of their own life stories, which will help them raise compassionate and resilient children.
On Number 4, we have Unconditional Parenting, by Alfie Kohn, published in the year 2006. Most parenting guides begin with the question “How can we get kids to do what they’re told?” — and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking “What do kids need — and how can we meet those needs?” What follows from that question are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.
One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including “time-outs”), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That’s precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it’s not the message most parents intend to send.
More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from “doing to” to “working with” parenting — including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.
At Number 3, we have Simplicity Parenting, by Kim John Payne published in 2019. As the pace of life accelerates, with too much stuff and too many choices and too little time, children are feeling the pressure. This book is for parents who want to slow down, but who don’t know how and for families with too much stuff and too many choices. Here are four simple steps for de-cluttering, quieting, and soothing family dynamics so that children can thrive at school, get along with peers, and nurture well-being. Using the extraordinary power of less, Kim John Payne, one of the world’s leading Rudolf Steiner/Waldorf educators, offers novel ways to help children feel calmer, happier, and more secure.
Our Number 2, is Sh!t No One Tells You (4 Book Series), by Dawn Dais. There comes a time in every new mother’s life when she finds herself staring at her screaming, smelly “bundle of joy” and wishing someone had told her that her house would reek of vomit, or that she shouldn’t buy the cute onesies with a thousand impossible buttons, or that she might cry more than the baby.
Best-selling author Dawn Dais, mother of two tiny terrors, is convinced that there is a reason for this lack of preparedness. She believes that a vast conspiracy exists to hide the horrific truth about parenting from doe-eyed expectant mothers who might otherwise abandon their babies in hospitals and run for it. Eschewing the adorableness that oozes out of other parenting books, Dais offers real advice from real moms-along with hilarious anecdotes, clever tips, and the genuine encouragement every mom needs in order to survive the first year of parenthood. The Sh!t No One Tells You is a must-have companion for every new mother’s sleepless nights and poop-filled days.
And finally, on Number 1, we have How to Talk so Kids Can Learn, by Adele Faber, published in 1996. The leading experts on parent-child communication show parents and teachers how to motivate kids to learn and succeed in school. Using the unique communication strategies, down-to-earth dialogues, and delightful cartoons that are the hallmark of their multi-million-copy bestseller How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk, Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish show parents and teachers how to help children handle the everyday problems that interfere with learning. This breakthrough book demonstrates how parents and teachers can join forces to inspire kids to be self-directed, self-disciplined, and responsive to the wonders of learning.September 29, 2019